I allowed my children to watch 30 minutes of TV in their bedrooms prior to bedtime lights out. One night I kissed my 7 year old good night and as I turned to walk away she said “Ma, can you put the TV on the SEX channel.” WHAT!!!!!!! WE HAVE A SEX CHANNEL!!!!!! OMG!!!!!!!!! More recently, my girls and I were watching television at 8:00 pm, not midnight, and one of the characters in a popular TV show asked his girlfriend if he could have some “lettuce.” My girls smiled because they knew that I was oblivious to what “lettuce” meant. I thought we were watching the food channel – SMH!!!!!!
S-E-X (I’m spelling it) is all around us, morning, noon, and night. It’s on TV, it’s in the music, in the books, on the radio, billboards (I live in Las Vegas), computer games, and on the internet. So, if you’re trying to protect your children from being exposed to S-E-X too early, good luck.
The best way to prepare your children for the “Sex Revolution” is with knowledge. I wasn’t really good at having the “sex talk” with my girls. I never, ever, ever talked about sex with my mother. As a result, I felt extremely uncomfortable addressing “it” with my daughters, so I did the next best thing, I bought them a book, complete with pictures. And no, we did not read it together. One night my youngest yelled out “Ma, what does circumcision mean?” I cheerfully responded, “look it up in your book.” The next sound I heard was OWWWWWW!!!!!!! Yep, that pretty much sums up circumcision.
So Dr. J, what is the lesson here? I learned something today because I had no idea what “lettuce” meant. I definitely have a different perspective on the “salad bar.” Do your children try to engage you in matters of sex? Funny, during my childhood, I remember the sex talks as “don’t do it.” End of discussion. I have talked about sex at multiple levels with my children. I don’t believe it encouraged them or dissuaded them from engaging in the act. If they did, they were aware of the implications of indulgence at mentally and physically premature stages. We cannot imagine our kids having sex…at whatever age! We’d like to think, especially when they are young teens, that our children’s innocence remains “intact” or natural state. Experimentation is a driver among the youth, i. e., “I kissed a girl and I liked it.”
JR, my children ALWAYS try to engage me in conversations about sex. I think that they know that it makes me uncomfortable to talk about the “S” word with them. Certain sexual acts may have been around when I was growing up, but NO ONE mentioned it in public. A girl kissing a girl is one of those things. The big one, and most widely accepted is Oral sex. I’m just not ready to talk openly about that with my children. But, I don’t have to because it is all over the TV!!!!!!!!!