Pick and choose your battles, sometimes you just have to lay down and take the eight count. My rule of thumb is “If your decision does not impact me in any way, have at it.” For example, if you want to give yourself a haircut, I don’t care. Your peers will surely tell you how it looks (hee hee hee). If you want to pierce your tongue, we have a problem. If your tongue becomes infected, I have to pay the doctor bills. Your stupidity has impacted my purse (no can do – permission denied). If your child refuses to clean his/her bedroom, and nothing is crawling out, no problem; close the bedroom door and keep it moving. But, he/she can’t sleep on the couch when they get totally disgusted with their living conditions. Don’t want to go to school, we have a problem. School is mandatory and the authorities will seek answers from ME.
I know that this will be hard for most of you because kids can be gross. If their behavior is only gross to you, the behavior will not stop. They need to be grossed out too. Believe me, you will have enough battles to fight without fighting the ones that will not change the rotation of the planets.
Take the 8 count
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Easier said than done. We have different comfort levels when it comes to grossness. How does not having to clean their rooms contribute to their individual growth? Isn’t that part of discipline and responsibility?What are the “worthwhile” battles that fuel the victory?
I see your point, however my point is that we must pick and choose our battles. You could find ten things, a day, to fight with your children about. But, is that how YOU want to spend YOUR days? Remember, it’s not always about them. You must protect your sanity. Certain battles require our immediate attention because they have the potential to impact their lives and yours. If your child is not doing homework, it’s time to take out the boxing gloves. If your child is doing something illegal, boxing gloves. Not cleaning his room, who is it hurting. There are many other ways that we can teach our children to be responsible.